The First Rule of Wrestling Club

I came home from work yesterday and D presented me with the singular best piece of mail I have ever received. It was addressed to RESIDENT at our address, and the yellow mini-legal-size note inside was the stuff dreams are made of:

In case you can't make it out, here's what it says:

Don't worry, I'm not dead! (HAPPY 2013!!!)

How winter makes me feel

Hello there, Internet!

I didn't die. I just have a serious commitment to bailing on projects. But it's New Year's Day, the starkest reminder of one's shortfalls and the vast tundra of unaccomplished goals crowding the ever-dwindling time left in life. So I thought I'd pick it back up. Even though I don't really have anything to say because winter makes me put on sweatpants and ignore phone calls and drink in the morning.

Because last year's high octane New Year's Even plans were such shit (and Jonathan Sawyer, I'm still holding a grudge), D and I decided to stay in for a quiet night. 

When life hands you a lemon tree

Back in South Carolina, D and I started impulsively buying fruit trees. We moved before we got more than two, but we've been carefully trying to keep them alive despite constantly moving from one rental to the next. This summer, we were blessed with a few (admittedly not very big or juicy) figs, but even more exciting is this:

Internet, it has taken us three years. But I am proud to announce that our Meyer lemon tree has finally... finally produced four perfect lemons. One is still on the tree to finish ripening a bit, but here are the first three:

Tada!

What do you do with four (or three) perfect lemons? How do you make the most of them, when you know it could be another year or two (or three) before the next batch is ready?

Why, you drink them, of course!

Cleveland Beer Week on a Budget

Last year was my first Cleveland Beer Week celebration, and all I did was go to Brewzilla. (It was awesome, but I didn't get in on any of the pint nights, etc.) This year, I am still being selective with which events I attend, because I don't have $5 million to spend on craft beer, no matter what week it is.

I did go to Southside last night to taste their Dogfish Head Tower Tipper selection. Including tip, it was $30 for four nine-ounce beers (two for me, two for D), so you can see why that might get a little expensive day after day.

So instead, I think I'll swing by my friendly local Mini Mart and have my own at-home Cleveland beer tasting. If you're thinking about paying rent next month, this might be the way for you to go, too! Here are my recommendations:

Strongsville's Brew Kettle Old 21. An imperial IPA that at 9% alcohol,
is delicious and also dangerous in any quantity.

Akron's Thirsty Dog Twisted Kilt. A Scottish Ale.

Obviously, you should include a GLBC brew.
You'll have plenty of time to  drink Christmas Ale in the coming months.
Have an Oktoberfest. (Though if it were available right now, I'd tell you to have a Lake Erie Monster. Yum.)

North Olmsted's Fat Head's Head Hunter IPA. (Can you tell I like IPAs?
Really, take your pick of the FH brews - I accidentally had the Bumble Berry last weekend, though - and
if you're not a fan of fruit beers, steer clear. It was like drinking a muffin. If you *do* like
fruit beers, you'll love it.) 

Of course, there are hundreds of Ohio-brewed beers for you to choose from, but these would be my tried-and-true few to take home.

What's your favorite local craft brew? Will you be attending Brewzilla?

(Would it be weird for me to go in costume, maybe as a unicorn? I have a Halloween party immediately afterward.)

~*ScaAaAry*~ October: Episode 2

In the last post, we talked about how horrifying centipedes are. Next up: WATER SNAKES.

Hello goodbye.
[image source]

~*ScaAaAry*~ October: Episode 1

Happy October, internet!

As usual, I've been terrible about writing because I forgot what I meant for this blog to be about, and that causes me immense writer's block.

Fortunately, it's almost Halloween, which means I can talk about something I have in spades: FEARS! The inspiration for a "Things I'm Scared of" series came to me this morning as I was breaking a banana into pieces for D's smoothie. I looked out into the dining room and there I saw on the wall...

How do you like them apples?

I think it's close enough to the official date to welcome you all to fall. 

It's getting cooler, I'm driving home in sun glare, the cats have started to pretend to like us so they can steal our body heat, and I started my annual habit of sloppy knitting in front of the TV. (Sloppy as in lazy, not as in drunk. It's hard to drink when your hands are full, but if anyone wants to buy me a Camelbak, I'll use it for wine.)

Anyway, in my family, there are two other ways to know that summer is over:

1. We make pinjur. (I'll explain.)
2. There's a ton of apples to harvest from my grandparents' house. (Actually, I won't lie: I don't really remember ever participating an an apple harvest before, because my diet was essentially about 85% mashed potatoes until I was about 20. But as you will notice in the picture below, I picked some apples today.)

Why would two people pick and bring home 200 apples?!